“Lord Tay?” Tayne blinked blearily as the voice of Thorne’s son tugged him back out and away from his zombie-like state of autopiloted stupour.
“Ugh?” The degenerate grunted without so much as a turn of his head, completely uncaring as to how the young noble took his answer.
“Do you want to dick my daughter?” Fuck, what?
“Daughter?” Panic had perked Tayne up a little as the adreneline spike coursed through his veins. How could this kid have a daughter of fuckable age? No, not even that, why the shit was he asking him to fuck her?
“What?” Javid replied with a confused tone. Tayne frowned as he finally mustered the energy to turn his gaze over toward the blonde haired blue eyed young man, his face mostly obscured by the green and blue scarf-like garment the four all wore, yet still the expression in his eyes clearly bewildered. “I asked if you want a drink of water.” The confused young man held up his full flask before him as if in explanation.
“Oh.” Tayne mumbled as he continued on. Damn he was tired. No, tired wasn’t even the word for it, Tayne Halmar was exhausted. This, to him, was obviously a given… Well who in their right mind was going to get a good nights sleep after coming within whispering distance of being murdered in a miserable sand filled cave by a brown skinned turban wearing bastard? Thorne, Tevin and Javid, that’s who. The three bastards had dropped right off back to sleep almost instantly to leave Tayne wide awake with warm, moist trousers that clung uncomfortably not only to his legs but also to the fine granules of sand that were… well absolutely bloody everywhere. “No.” No? The voice in the drunk’s head almost screamed, No? Are you fucking insane? your tongues dryer than a corpse’s slit. “Nes.” Tayne frowned at the strange mumbled word that escaped from his lips as the reason for it fled, all he could remember was something about a dead prostitute… Or something. Why the fuck was Javid staring at him?
“Lord Tay?” Great, another one. Tayne began to giggle softly as he watched Thorne Von’faygan stroll over through the swirling sand’s as he made a beesline straight for the spot that Tayne stood. “Tay are yoooouuuuuu aaaaaallrrrrrriiiiigggghhhhtttt?” Tayne blinked in surprise as the man’s words suddenly elongated and dipped in volume, just as the air around them turned into some sort of shiny ripple filled liquid. Thorne cursed loudly as his pace increased, sand flung up in his wake as the man charged over toward Tayne. What the fuck have you done now? Tayne giggled loudly at the angry voice in his head. This wasn’t just tiredness… something was wrong.
“Frorne” The ex-drunk attempt to shout his companions name as the world lurched suddenly to the side, the words slurred and deep as his lips refused to cooperate.
“Tay, foooooocus on my voiiiiceeeee” The man had grabbed Tayne by either shoulder, his face thrust up into Tay’s own. “Liiiiiisten to meeeee.” Each word spoken seemed stretched, drawn out and impossibly deep.
“Fwirn?” Tayne blinked as another nonsensical word left his mouth.
“Taayyyyyy, the assaaaaaaasin. Whereeeee did he cut youuuuuuu?”
“Waaahpow!” Tayne shouted as he slammed one outstretched hand down on the big man’s shoulder in immitation of a real dagonian martial artist, though the result of which seemed akin to punching a brick wall.
“Taaaaaay.” Thorne’s face seemed odd, oblong and twisted. “Whereee did he cuuuut you?” cut? who? “Tay daaaaamit, listen to meeee!” Tayne frowned. “You’ve beeeeeen poisoned… I need to locaaaaaaate the wound aaaaaaand extract the residue or you maaaay dieeeeeeee..” Tayne giggled.
“Faaaatherrrrr!” Javid’s shout caused both Tayne and Thorne to shift their attention over to the young blonde haired man whom was stood with his back to them, his eyes locked to a point up the massive sandy dune where three robed men stood.
“Geeeeet downnnnnn!” Tay’s brow lowered in annoyance at the large man’s roar of warning as the other three threw themselves to the ground with hands held above their heads. “Taaaaayyyyy, get doooooowwwwwnnnnn!”
“No.” Tayne smirked as he replied, the men on the hill already fogotten.
“Tayyy-” A thud as something smashed into the sand between them cut the man off as grains bloomed upward. An arrow?
“Nuh-uh.” It all made sense now. As Thorne had stated, he had been poisoned somehow by that damn cloth wrapped assassin, and this nonesense happening before him was nothing but a delusion.
“Geeeet doooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwnnnnn.” Tayne giggled again as Thorne’s words continued in a drawn out tone. Right, so he know he was off his rocker, but how did he stop it? Beat the delusion. The voice stated confidently, so confidently in fact that Tayne stopped not at all to even contemplate the situation before he nodded in agreement.
“Eyyyy!” Tayne roared with a smile as he swung his arms about himself. “Shtup et!” Another fake arrow thumped into the ground beside his foot as he continued. “Ey! Non’o dat!”
The three delusional apparations stared down the hill in bewilderment as Tayne Halmar continued on upward, a smile that wouldn’t have been out of place on the face of the village idiot frimly locked to his sand covered face as he hiccuped and stumbled his way up the increasingly difficult to climb sand dune.
“Abujar habujar bah blah bah!” Roared one of the three not-real men, or at least something that sounded like that… Perhaps “Prepare to die infidel scum!” or something along those lines, yet in the state the degenerate was in the words meant no more than flibblewigum. Tayne blinked. Flibblewigum? what the fuck is that? The roar of his companions sounded loud behind, the words as unintelligible as the men before him.
Slowly the fake man raised his bow, the arrow notched within held to his cheek as the imaginary desert assasin took aim.
“Flibblewigum!” yelled Tayne with a chuckle. Twang. The man let loose. The arrow seemed to move impossibly slowly thrugh the air as the deadly projectile sailed constantly forward, it’s red fletched shaft mid spin as Tayne reached up and plucked the missile from the air. Silence. The roars of his friends stopped, the chatter of the desert people cut short. “Wassat?” The frown Tayne wore deepened even further as he watched the awed expression of each of the men.
“Aiiiiieeeeyeeee!” One of the make believe desert men screamed as he charged forward, scimitar bared high above his head. Again without thought Tayne swung his hand forward casually, the arrow gripped tight within.
“Ug…” His assailant dropped before him, red fletched arrow buried deep into his right eye socket. Again silence.
The world around him had begun to grow dark, the soft rippling sand filled with motion like the waves of a storm afflicted sea.
“Ah Shiznit.” Tayne whispered as conciousness fled.